Survivor Profile - Karen Bond

My Beautiful Mask

My name is Karen.  A few years ago, something happened to me that completely changed my life forever.  This is my story.

At the time, I was teaching English in South America.  I was a British girl in my twenties - attractive, adventurous, and having the time of my life.  I came to Canada during the Christmas holidays to visit a French-Canadian guy who I had had a holiday romance with while backpacking in Asia the year before.  I was supposed to be here for a fun-packed six weeks.  It was my first time in Canada, and I was looking forward to touring the Rockies, going skiing for the first time, and meeting my boyfriend’s mom.

My boyfriend, Marc, had rented out a trailer for the winter in the interior of B.C., and that’s where we were staying at the time of the accident.  It was freezing in there, and I especially felt it as I had just arrived from a tropical country.  Marc decided to light the propane furnace, and got the okay from the landlady, who assured him that it was safe and had been checked.  It hadn’t.  So he lit it, not knowing that the trailer was riddled with leaks.  We sat around watching “Friends”, not knowing that propane gas was trickling into the trailer.  Half an hour later, I decided to go outside for a smoke.   I opened the door.  Suddenly, there was a bang, and I was engulfed in flames. 

When I woke up on the Burn Unit at Vancouver General Hospital, my hands had already been grafted, and my face was almost completely burnt except for around my eyes (thank God I had been wearing my glasses!).  After several attempts, my face was successfully grafted.  I had gotten the idea that my face would then go back to normal.  It took a while for me to accept that it could never be the same as it had been before the accident.  But, I was determined to make it as close to that as I possibly could.

MY FACE!  I was 28, in the prime of my life, and suddenly I looked like a skinned pig!  I was shocked when I first saw my poor ravaged face, and still now when I look at photos of myself from that time, I can’t believe it was that bad. 

I had to wear a hard plastic mask on my face, day and night – even on the day that I wed Marc.  It was so difficult at first.  I couldn’t bear to be stared at.  But, of course, people are naturally curious, and I eventually learnt to accept that – most of the time!  I knew that I had to wear the mask all the time if I wanted it to work, if I wanted my scars to flatten.  I wanted to look as good as I possibly could.  I was in my twenties, and it was too soon for me to lose my looks.  Perhaps that sounds superficial, but you don’t realize how important your looks are until they are suddenly taken away from you.   Fortunately, I had my husband to support me.  It was tough for us though.  We had very little money, no belongings between us, and minds haunted by what had happened to us.  We could not kiss, because I had to wear my mask all the time.  We both had to wear our pressure garments day and night, and I had to wear a retainer while I was sleeping.  I hardly felt sexy.  I felt self-conscious and ugly whenever I took my mask off, and only managed to keep my self-esteem intact because Marc frequently told me how beautiful I was, and how much he loved me. 

I am so glad that I endured wearing the mask.  I had to have a number of surgeries for the first three years after my accident, and I ended up wearing it for that whole period, for 23.5 hours per day.  I still can’t believe I wore it for such a long time.  But now it is a dim and distant memory.  And if you could only see me today!  Of course, I don’t look exactly like I did before the accident.  I am eight years older for starters!  But my skin is smooth.  So smooth, in fact, that my friends of the same age actually look older than me because I have hardly any wrinkles due to my grafts, and they are complaining about their crow’s feet and laughter lines!  I can go out in the street with no make up on at all and, nowadays, I rarely get asked about what happened to me, and I don’t get stared at anymore.  I recently got permanent make up on my eyebrows, as they were burnt off and, when I feel like being a girl, I wear special camouflage make up that I buy from LeiLani.

Having a relatively normal-looking face has helped me to move on with my life.  Since the accident, I have given birth to my son, bought a house in Vancouver, and completed a Master’s degree.  I work as an English teacher.  I can go about my life like anyone else. 

So, if you recently got facial burns, and are ever wondering if you should bother wearing your mask or not, think about my story.  Wearing a mask is uncomfortable, it’s a pain to have to get it adjusted all the time, and it can be hard to deal with the stares.  But it’s definitely worth it in the end.

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